Navigating The Childfree Dating Maze

5 01 2009

The search for a life partner is just harder for childfree people. If you have found your Childfree life partner it’s one of the things for which you can be grateful. I know I am, especially since my husband and I actually met online.

A conversation with a friend some months ago got me thinking about a blog article. My friend and I were having lunch one day and she asked me… “why is it so hard to find a childfree man? I mean it’s REALLY hard!” She had been considering dating a guy and, from what she said, it would be a big mistake.

Turns out that, even though she had explicitly and firmly said “no kids” in her profile, it turned out although he said he understood and “didn’t have any kids” he later revealed he has kids from past relationships. That’s more than one.

Immediate alarm bells started going off for my friend, but there was worse to come. He apparently thought she wasn’t serious when she said she wasn’t interested in kids. And he also couldn’t seem to understand why she wouldn’t cook, watch his kids on the weekend (if things got serious) and “take care” of them and him. Wasn’t that love?

By now, my jaw had dropped. I alternated between astonished laughter and disbelief…was this person for real?

Apparently he was. And he saw nothing wrong with his “expectations.”

I commiserated with my friend, and we both agreed that it was a no-go, and she should run as far as possible from that “potential relationship”.  However she wondered if she should just settle for someone who might have kids but are not living with him or are older.

I said that was a bad idea. For all sorts of reasons.

However, there is a very real issue here – how difficult it is for childfree people to meet other childfree people. Men tell me all the women they meet can’t wait to “settle down and have kids”, and get a house in the ‘burbs as soon as possible…” Baby Rabies is barely hidden.

Or they have children from past relationships and seem to think “childfree” means “I want some kids to look after.” They are simply looking for a “Baby Daddy”. My husband met several women like that before we met. They were nice, but the thought of being step-father was not.

(And yes, he did state clearly he did not want children).

The childfree women tell me all the men they meet either don’t believe them when they state “I do not want children” or say they do (while they secretly don’t) and try to convert the women from the “error of their ways.” Or, they meet men who can’t wait to have children… because they’ve suddenly realized they need to “prove” their manhood by having a child, or they want a mini-them.

And, as in my friends example, increasingly the are meeting men with baggage, only too willing for a Baby mama to help carry the load. Childfree, in their understand seems to mean “free” to take on kids… his.

I also came across an article on The Childfree Life, illustrating just this scenario and an interesting discussion which ensued in the forum.  Among the issues were  when the man says the kids are

“out of his life”

“grown up and living somewhere else” or

“only around for short periods or weekends”

All of which don’t make for childfree bliss, but do make for  situations likely to put the childfree person a distinctive 2nd or third.  Children are never completely out of your life.

On top of that there’s the question (see the article) of when to drop the childfree bombshell. If you’re a childfree woman you need to have the checklist of questions ready. The earlier they are asked, the better, before things get too serious. In fact, within the first few dates if no “warning signs” haven’t popped up. After all, if the person is wrong, why waste time with them? Best to move on – and quickly and look for Mr Right – who does NOT want kids.

I have to say I never had to jump through these hoops. Looking back, I think I was fortunate. When we were dating my husband was very sure he didn’t want kids,  and he said so. I was the one who was hesitant – because I’d never really given the issue a lot of thought – other than “someday I’d probably have kids. I didn’t really want them when I considered the question properly.

Given the number of truly childfree men and women out there – and I mean childfree in the real sense of the word – I wonder why more of us don’t meet.  Do we need childfree only dating sites? Would it work? Why? Why not? What do you think?

I didn’t have any satisfactory answers to my friend’s question, except to say I know  the childfree men are out there, and to hang in there and not settle. I can understand her frustration though.

The dating maze is much harder if you’re childfree looking for another childfree person as a life partner. In fact it’s an entirely different ball game.

All thoughts, as always are welcome. I’d love to give my friend some more encouragement.

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Childfree Articles Worth A Mention… And A Long Way To Go

22 12 2008

Christmas and the Holidays are here and a brand new year is just a couple of weeks away. Even with all the economic upheaval a New Year brings new hope.  It’s been a very busy year for me… and on Like It is – which seems to be growing in leaps and bounds, thanks to the thought-provoking comments and conversation we have here. I always learn something.

Childfree Articles Worth Mentioning

So, what, if anything has changed for childfree people? Maybe it’s my imagination, but I feel I am seeing more and more people speak out about being childfree, in the sense that they decided not to have them, and, far from being unhappy are very happy, thank you. The post Married, Successful and Happy to be Childfree (link sent by a Like It Is reader and commentator) so impressed me that I’ve wanted to repost it for a while. 518 comments (mostly from childfree people) on an ABC site is not small potatoes. I tried leaving my own comment on the site, but there was such a cumbersome registration process I gave up.

See the link here:

Married, Successful and Happy To Be Childfree

The other great post which I thought worth a mention was this one:

Childfree Interviews

The sheer number of childfree women who gave such frank, insightful and in-depth interviews has done every childfree person a great service.  I wished the post could got more comments, but just the fact that the post is there means I can highlight it here. And I hope to be able to take the time to read through those interviews at some point. It’s always great to know that there are so many happily childfree people out there – if you feel you’re alone in being childfree, or not wanting kids – you most certainly are not alone.

A Long Way To Go

Having said that, when I was thinking about this post and where we are as childfree men and women, I still think that we’re still seen as “lesser” because we’ve decided not to have kids.

Here are some rather sad facts

  • We still pay more tax than our childed counterparts, get few, if any benefits – and are actually financing those who do have children.
  • Despite this we’re still lectured as to our “lack of contribution to society” which is really old
  • We’re still expected to pick up the slack in the office since we’re seen  to “not have a family after all”
  • We still have little or no representation… in popular media, unless it’s stereotypical – and invariably negative
  • We’re still judged based on whether we’ve reproduced or not… though what that has to do with doing a job well is beyond me.
  • As women we are still assumed to be “missing something” . This missing something (giving birth or at least being desperate to give birth) apparently qualifies us for womanhood.
  • It’s still assumed that anyone who doesn’t have or want kids is somehow living the life of Riley, is feckless and irresponsible
  • If you’re a man, you’ve not grown up until you’ve fathered a child…you’re also feckless and irresponsible and presumably the act of reproducing you will get you kicking and, if necessary screaming into the “real world”
  • When we say we don’t have kids we are still interrogated as to “why not?”
  • We’re expected to justify our choice not to reproduce
  • We still have to fight to get a tubal ligation to prevent pregnancy and told to go off and have a few kids before some doctor will be able to put aside their personal views to give what’s our right to have.

Oh, and only the childfree are reminded regularly that we’ll change our minds… for any number of reasons from wanting to prove our love for our spouses to wanting something to cuddle.

I’m sure you can add more, however I’ll stop there.

I’m very happy and contented being childfree because it’s right for me, and only me knows what’s right for me.  All the childfree people I’ve met (a few offline and many more online) are very happy being childfree and we’d just love those pressing them to change their minds to just lay off.

Perhaps in the not to distant future our voices will count for something. There’s more to life than having kids.

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Season’s Greetings –  and Best Wishes for a safe and peaceful New Year to you and yours. See you in 2009!

Feel free to leave comments as usual – I will be reading them. I’ll be back posting in the New Year.

Cheers,

BG.

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Merry Christmas Childfree or Single… You’re Working

16 12 2008

Merry Christmas You’re Working

I came across this article in today’s (Monday December 15th)Globe and Mail.  As a childfree person, given the season it was especially relevant – the inference that, since you don’t have children:

  • Christmas can’t possibly be important to you
  • You have no family to spend time with
  • You’re quite happy to come in and “cover” over Christmas – note we are talking expectation here
  • You’re available to fill in while parents take two weeks off without a blink
  • You have no life
  • Your time off is less meaningful (than those with children)
  • If you do have a life it’s of less importance because, hey, you haven’t sprogged so you can’t possibly need the time off (and parents do…)

I will leave you to read through the post…. and especially the comments.

Putting aside the 21 year old weather girl’s dubious expectations of paying her dues, the fact is that if you are single or childfree, in many companies there is an expectation by the childed and some others that they (the childed) get preference when it comes to taking time off at Christmas.

Reasons include those I’ve listed above. My views echo this one by Jennifer Hunter:

“legally people are entitled to take vacation time, and should be free to do so at a time of their choosing, not a time designated to be convenient after those who have children have submitted first dibs. While it is nice if co-workers can accommodate each other during the holiday season, no one should be forced to do so, simply because of their social status.”

Here is a comment from Shannon –

“I can understand the point of view of commentators and those quoted in the article, who feel that they should have as much right as any other person to take holidays over the end of December and beginning of January. I agree.

However, as a single mother whose babysitters and daycares have consistently informed me each year that they are not available to care for my child over the two weeks surrounding Christmas and New Year’s, and who has no family that would be available or capable of providing back up care, if I was not allowed to take one week of my three weeks of yearly vacation around Christmas, I would be forced to either take leave without pay or resign from my job.”

Well, Boo–bloody-hoo! So, what she’s saying is, because she’s can’t get sitters WE should care?  Um… my advice. Take leave without pay or resign. It’s pretty simple, really. Actually it’s not a case of “those who feel they have as much right to time off…” we DO have as much right as anyone else to take time off over the Christmas period. Parents - single or otherwise don’t have more rights, they just think they do.

I have as much right to take my vacation entitlement at Christmas as anyone else. And while I may offer to come in, that does NOT imply that my needs are any more or any less important than any other worker in the office, childed or no.

I usually do come in between Christmas and New Year if I am not travelling simply because it’s pretty quiet. I take  days off early in the New Year instead.  But it’s my choice. It’s always been appreciated, but the moment it starts being “expected” that those with kids somehow get preference, I will react. My mum is a nurse and she worked night duty shifts when we were growing up. Because she was part of an emergency service, they used to rotate the time off… some would get Christmas and some would get New Year.

And I believe there should be no requirement for childfree or single people to explain why we want time off over Christmas. (Yes, we get asked that too and it’s ridiculous).  Vacation/time off/cover should be decided fairly and equitably and quite frankly it’s nobody’s business what they are doing with their time off.

I have heard some stories of childed people actually  stating they should have the time off on the basis that they “have kids and Christmas is about kids” and “they need to see smiles when kids open up their pressies in the morning…yadda, yadda.

And you will see some very interesting views in the comments.

I thought one of the best ones was by Zanny…

“You have to stand up for yourself. If you want to take holidays at Christmas let your boss know well ahead of time.
If someone says they deserve the time off more because they have kids simply tell them you don’t give a sh!t about their kids. You are only a victim if you let it be so”.

Hear, Hear!

If you are single or childfree when it comes to time off over Christmas – or any other vacation time for that matter – ensure you are proactive if and when you want the time off. Negotiate and insist on an equitable solution. State early on that you intend taking time off over the period. And don’t feel you need to explain… you don’t.

Share your thoughts – and if you are single please feel free to add yours too!

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Childfree - No Holiday Guilt For Me

8 12 2008

Have to say this gives a whole new meaning to the words “cutting back”.

Job Loss Leads To Spending Guilt for holiday season

I first came across this article a few weeks ago. Quite why it was in the Health section of CNN is a mystery I’ve not been able to work out. There’s nothing “healthy” about this story at all  With the awful mess the economy’s in, along with job losses people were lamenting how this was going to impact Christmas/Holiday spending. For people with kids, it’s going to be a tough sell not being able to give their kids everything they’re expecting.

As a childfree family happily guilt isn’t something we experience. We like to unwrap presents under the tree, however mainly for the

What got me about the article though wasn’t this:

“It’s killing my husband not to be able to buy me a gift this year,” she added, “but our bills are three and four weeks behind.”

Which would be bad enough. It was this:

“Last year, Peterson and her husband, who works as a graphic artist, spent about $600 on gifts for their 3-year-old daughter. This year, Peterson wonders whether they’ll have enough money to pay the electric bill and buy groceries”.

OK, when I first read it I thought perhaps the story was a joke.. bit like an Onion story, where it seems real, but actually isn’t. But no, apparently it is real.

$600 on gifts for a 3–year-old child?!

But maybe I’ve lost the plot? Perhaps it’s perfectly normal to spend a ton on your child for the Holidays,  because clearly the article was intended to generate sympathy for the couple’s present circumstances.

I know when we’ve bought gifts for our whole family (nephews and nieces included) I doubt it’s come to even half that. And I know my parents never spent even close to that on Christmas gifts for me… or my siblings. Were they cheap? I didn’t think so. We weren’t rich, but we never went without. Besides, we were always soon bored with the toys we got.

One thing I am glad I don’t have as a childfree family is the self-imposed guilt. It must be hard if you want to give gifts and can’t however maybe it’s a case of values? Does a 3–year old cares if s/he gets $600 worth of things? Likely not, but the parents certainly do. Is there also pressure from others I also wonder. From society, which constantly advertises the best way to be happy at Christmas/during the Holidays is to buy lots of expensive things for your loved ones. The adage  that it’s the thought that counts isn’t enough these days. Get the “wrong” gift at Christmas and you may never be forgiven.

There’s pressure to get the latest and greatest accessories for the kids… heck –  there’s the pressure to have the kid when you have none and then have two, when you have only one. And then there’s the pressure to have a girl if you have only boys and boys if you have only girls, and so on, until the perfect situation is achieved. At which point another dizzying target is set, be this the latest $1,000 stroller or feeling compelled to hire a limo for graduation (yes, parents have told me horror stories of how they couldn’t say no…). I’ll bet that many kids are expecting to find the latest gadget among their gifts… and will be annoyed if they don’t get it.

I am constantly told (usually by parents) that “Christmas is all about the children”, “Christmas is for children” and “if you don’t have children, you must be miserable at Christmas”. Christmas and the holidays is what you make it. I know that kids love Christmas…I did and still do (partly because of the excitement of getting presents, even though you never quite knew what  you might receive) but if that includes keeping up with the Joneses in the spending leagues, taking part in the over – commercialization of the season, then it’s just one more reason I’m happy to be childfree.

But what say you? Maybe, being childfree, we simply don’t understand what it’s like.

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Be Godfather? You Must Be Joking!

1 12 2008

This post is rather last minute but I thought I just had to blog my childfree take. My hubs and I have begun watching our Christmas film list. And we’re watching “About A Boy.” And it’s hilarious. I’d never really looked at all the childed digs that abound in this film, perhaps because of the title – and that the main character does end up kind of adopting a boy. And I absolutely love this film. Watching it today though we had a laugh at the scene where Will (Hugh Grant) goes round to visit his friends, who’ve recently had a baby.

The mother, with baby in tow, proceeds to tear strips of Will, for not being mature, and being shallow because he didn’t want kids. The large living room is in disarray with baby toys strewn around, thrown up food on the sofa. Will’s asked to hold the baby (presumably to absorb the baby-rabies that would make him want to have one of his own) and promptly gives it back to the mother.

The  funniest thing was that then, the mother (remember she’d said Will was shallow and immature?) asks him if he’d like to be the baby’s Godfather. His reply is classic:

Among other things he says… “You must be joking!” Equally satisfying and hilarious(to us anyway) was seeing the shocked look on the parents face… how could anyone refuse to be Godfather to their precious baby?!”

Even better was Will’s next comment… “Besides, I’d be a terrible Godfather to little Imogen… I’m every bit as shallow as you think I am.”

Excellent. I laughed aloud.

Just that short scene highlighted quite a few childfree bingoes

Single man goes round to visit. Proud parents bring out the baby and start chirping about how wonderful having one is and how he should have one of his own. Mother gives new (and fragile) baby to single man single man reluctantly takes baby and then promptly returns it to mother – for fear of breaking it and doesn’t like babies anyway. Mother gives single man exasperated look in manner of “what, don’t you want to hold her? She’s adorable! How could you not love to hold my baby?”

Mother then reams out single guy  (presumably since osmosis didn’t have time to catch/had no effect) saying that single guy is shallow, and lacks depth and when is single guy going to grow up and settle down (and have kids). In other words (as if you need them) Why don’t you have kids? Why aren’t you tied down? Oh, and I’m mad you’re free when so many of my girlfriends are just dying for a  father for their kids/someone to give them babies. You’ll end up childless and alone… most people need kids to keep them grounded… you’re a selfish bastard…

Um. Will is single. He’s allowed to be selfish if he wants.

You have to wonder why then mother thinks that single guy is the best choice to be Godfather??

Delicious irony – as seen from my childfree perspective. I never really noticed it before.

Oh, yes, and the husband comes in with the other child, a precocious two year old and, when chocolate covered child blows a raspberry at Will, smiles indulgently and says… “they’re lovely really…”

Yep, bingoes galore (and I’m sure tongue in cheek wasn’t too far off).

I just had to share. I’m going back to “About A Boy”.

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Happy Thanksgiving Everyone! Thanks For All The Childfreedom You Share!

26 11 2008

Childfreedom: What Are You Thankful For?

I found this post on Childfreedom’s blog. And I thought what a great way to say Happy Thanksgiving.  As usual I have to fight with Google/Blogger, BUT, when you have a moment head over and add to the list. I think you’ll find though, as I did that  the long list covers nearly everything I’m thankful for as well (even though we had our own Thanksgiving in  back in October in Canada).  Happy to be Childfree!

So I want to say Happy Thanksgiving to all my US readers, blurkers and friends, thank you for sharing –  and try to ignore the childfree family bingoes because you know you can always let rip here.

Cheers!

Britgirl.

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Childfree… and It’s Not Up For Discussion

25 11 2008

I was thinking of all the fuss over the Motrin Ad. All those Mommies getting their knickers in a twist and so offended because someone dares to poke fun at some of the myths of motherhood. Taking to the blogs, to Twitter and mobilizing every offended mommy to complain in righteous indignation about, as someone has rightly said on this blog, things that arise from their own CHOICES.

Not that complaining isn’t their right.. but with at least two very young children brutally tortured and murdered in the last few weeks, the economic crisis the the world is currently facing it’s really hard to imagine these women have a clue. I didn’t detect any outraged blogging frenzy about any of the above though. Strange. Or not.

I was pleased to see most  normal ( read non-feministing) blogs seemed to think the Motrin mommies came off looking petulant and whiny. The fact is the world has more important things to worry about.

It got me thinking though. I find people who are childfree are never in my face. In fact, unless you asked a person their “reproductive status” aka “so, do you have kids?” you would never know who was childfree. You get the chance to talk to them as individuals – until they make sure they bring in their kids.  I never ask the “do you have children?” question when I meet someone for the first time. I invariably hope that my not asking the kiddie question will prevent the same question being directed at me. No such luck. Business or social settings people can’t seem to help themselves. They feel they have to ask. And then they proceed to tell me how hard it is bringing up kids! But how it’s so worthwhile…who said I cared?

So, OK, they ask. But instead of taking my “No, I don’t” as the reason to shut up and change the subject they either decide they need to find out why (following up with things like “oh, didn’t you want them then?” “or why not?” or why, don’t you like kids?”). And let’s not forget the “you don’t know what you’re missing, it’s so worth it!”

The other reaction of course is that conversation stops dead… as if without children to talk about it’s not worth bothering.

But, as we’ve seen in the Motrin tea-cup storm, when it comes to mommyism, it’s seemingly OK to get offended.

I don’t get in people’s faces announcing I’m chilfree. I feel that whether or not a person has kids is generally irrelevant to the conversation.

It’s rude and disrespectful when the childed see fit to not only question the childfree person’s choice, but try and convert them –  then and there – over to their way of thinking. What happened to respecting others’ choices?

I’m thinking the next time I’m asked the kiddie question my response will be: No. I don’t have kids. And, if the questioning goes further, simply say “it’s not up for discussion.”

At least I know I’m not the only one who has to put up with it….

Share your thoughts for stopping the “kiddie questions” in their tracks. I plan on compiling a list of them, because we really do need to be prepared for the inevitable inquisition into why we haven’t produced off-spring.

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The Motrin Ad

19 11 2008

The Motrin Ad that was taken down because the mommies complained

I first noticed this as an example of social media going very wrong… for the company. I was going to blog it on my other (business) blog about Social Media I thought it was something terrible and then I watched the ad…. and can’t for the life of me work out what the problem is. THIS is what the mommies were getting all hot under the collar about? My childfree me thought… worth a blog here.

Apparently, if you believe the Twitter streams, the mommies got annoyed because Motrin seemed to be implying that wearing a baby in a sling is a “fashion statement” or that “Motrin is somehow attacking their right to wear their baby..”

What?? I’ve tried but I can’t see what the fuss is about. And anyway, aren’t babies being pushed as the must-have accessory anyway? One that no woman is complete without

Motrin, apologized profusely and took down all their ads… everywhere. Aren’t there better things to protest over? Like the fact a baby was abused and killed. Never saw any Twittering about that news…

Some people need to chill and find other things to worry about… life is far too short.

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Baby P - A Mother’s Bond and Failure By All - Big Time

17 11 2008

A short life of misery and pain

Every time I read a story like this I think that people really should be vetted before they are allowed to become parents.

The story of Baby P is so horrific that I avoided reading it for ages. And then I was sad for what that child must have gone through… in just 17 months. 17 months of sheer hell. And then I felt angry, wondering why that child, why any child should suffer in like this in this day and age.  Baby P was abused for months and eventually killed, if not by his mother, then almost certainly by the mother’s new boyfriend with her tacit consent. For shame.

When Social workers suspected something might be wrong he should never have been returned to that family. He was of course because the mother somehow convinced them all was ok. .  But not until a whistle-blower sends a letter to the local dept of health does anything get started. Even then, bruises were missed  when he was admitted to hospital– and a whole lot more. And then:

1 August 2007: The boy is examined at a child development clinic.

2 August 2007: Police tell the mother she will not be prosecuted after her case is considered by the Crown Prosecution Service.

3 August 2007: Baby P is found dead in his cot.

11 November 2008: Jason Owen, 36, from Bromley, and the 32-year-old boyfriend of the boy’s mother are found guilty of causing the death of Baby P. The boy’s mother had pleaded guilty to the same charge.

On my last post there was a comment about worthless parents and on reading it, I felt it was a bit strong. Not now. Because this was a bloody worthless parent. What kind of parent allows her child to be tortured and killed? Childfree or no, interested in children or not, this story is nothing short of horrific. And everyone should be horrified.

It isn’t the first. And it won’t be the last.

Children seem to be just so much collateral damage. Trotted out as trophies of “being a real woman” as proof of undying love, as the latest accessory; or “something to love”, set as the ultimate achievement of “womanhood.” And of course the sign of a “real marriage.” Go, on, have a baby. Life’s incomplete without one.

And at the same time they are casualties of people who should never have been allowed to have them in the first place.

After the baby’s dead of course, the usual blame game and buck passing starts. Everybody dropped the ball and now everyone’s trying to Cover Their Arse. For shame. The Government is blustering with outrage (as usual). Doesn’t change the fact that a child died when it shouldn’t have.

The father is heart-broken…reading between the lines it seems he had no access for a while to his son. But not a lot said there in this sorry tale. Everybody failed spectacularly.

There are bad, worthless parents out there. People who really should not be parents but are because they can.

Seems that there is very little thought for what’s in the interest of the child.

Most parents don’t fall into this category. We know that.  But people should not have children just because they can.

At least no more hurt for Baby P. I hope they lock up his abusers and so-called mother and throw away the key.

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Michelle Obama - “My Number 1 Job is to be First Mom”

10 11 2008

As I read this article in the TimesOnline, a number of different thoughts coursed through my mind.

Michelle Obama - My No 1 job as First Lady is to be first Mom

Having been thrilled to bits at the election outcome in the US (no more having to listen to Sarah Palin’s goofs for one thing) I must admit that, as a childfree person, the title of the article didn’t exactly have me whooping for joy.

I think Michelle Obama will be a great First Lady. This is no silver-spoon-born-with-in mouth woman, but someone who’s earned her success, is brilliant and down to earth and a whole lot more  What a change from past First Ladies! Even if she has given up her own professional practice to support her husband.

My only quibble as a childfree person is that I just would have liked her to also be considering all working women, not just those with children. better still – why not all women?

Her focus is on her children. But childfree families are also families. Contrary to popular myth not all childfree women are rich and living the Life of Riley. We also work very hard, have none of the benefits that those with children have – and might I add, because we are childfree pay the highest burden of taxes – few, if any benefits we are eligible to claim.  Many childfree people are also taking care of elders – this isn’t the preserve of those who have children.

Parenting is hard (parents are always telling me how hard, ”but worth it” it is), being a single parent is even harder. The thing is having children is a choice, not a given. Everyone had – and has a choice as to whether to have children or not.

What I’d like to see more is of is people thinking a little harder before they have children, as an alternative to the “well, bringing up kids is hard work, but you should do it,” or “you’re married, why on earth don’t you have kids?” that is society’s rallying cry.  Not to mention the “I’ll just have a kid because I want one, never mind about the father, I’m entitled.”

Right now there is nothing to counteract the pressures of our kid-centric society, on the contrary, there is plenty of pressure to have children whether or not you can actually afford them.

Childfree and single people – men and women - people pay the highest burden of taxes today. Just because we don’t have children – because we decided not to do so –  doesn’t mean we don’t count.

Or does it?

One last thing. I think the Obama children are beautiful. I think it’s totally right that children, if you have them, should come first.  But I’m already fed up hearing about how her children are the centre of her life, etc, etc.…truth be told, I don’t care.  Once again I found myself wondering why it is that people who have children think that everyone else wants to hear about them. I know they are at the top of her priority list. And they should be.

I doubt that her kids will be at the top of any chilfree persons priority list.  Not that we were expecting any real “air-time” however it would be nice to think we’d get a look-in.

What do you think?

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