Like It Is

A 67-year-old woman who is believed to be the world’s oldest new mother told a British Sunday newspaper she lied to a U.S. fertility clinic — saying she was 55 — to get treatment.

“Often circumstances put you between a rock and a hard place and maybe things shouldn’t have been done in the way they were done but that was the only way to achieve the thing I had always dreamed of and I did it,” she said. Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve always had my doubts about the maternal instinct. I used to hear about it quite frequently – in fact I still do. We’re are told all real women have it.

We are told that its “natural” for women to want babies and this view is still, in my opinion, widely held. The implication is that a childfree woman is “unnatural”. Many childfree women have been accused of not fulfilling their “natural” role – supposedly to produce and nurture children.

As far as the maternal instinct is concerned there have been many theories about whether or not it exists. Read the rest of this entry »

Alison Marshall likes spending time with their niece and nephew. She also likes giving them back at the end of the day and returning to the relative peace and quiet of her home. Alison and her husband are childfree. Like me, she likes children in small doses. I can certainly identify.

This article in the The Times Online, called Two’s Family, Three’s a Pain by Anabell Thorpe, makes an interesting read. Although much of it isn’t news to most childfree people (um, yes, we’ve been living quite happy fulfilled lives, thanks very much, despite the ridicule and hostility we face at almost every turn) it is at least good to see an article in the mainstream media that is fairly supportive of the childfree life. Or at the very least doesn’t condemn it. I also liked how they included input from Nicky DeFago, who is childfree – and whose book Childfree and Loving It I highly recommend.

A few points in the article I thought were worthy of mention - you’ll probably be familiar with these already: Read the rest of this entry »

Conservatives Suddenly Defending the Childfree?

Ultra conservative Rush Limbaugh defending women without children?? WTF? I actually found myself agreeing with what he is saying. It all erupted from what is now being called “The Barbara Boxer Thing” where on Jan 12, Democratic Senator Barbara Boxer apparently attacked Condolezza Rice for being single and childless. Read the rest of this entry »

And this time, who better to do it than a sleazy politician who simply loves to engage in point scoring. This time it is Jack Layton of the New Democrats, who is accusing the banks of “gouging customers with the fees they charge to withdraw and deposit cash at ATMs” (Automatic Tellers, or Cash Points if you’re a UK reader).

Mr Layton, in an election style street corner rant, said that for a bank to charge a customer who wants $40 or $60 of their money out from an ATM is unfair. And that the $19 billion profits Canadian banks made last year should be enough to waive ATM convenience fees.

Yes, of course we all hate banks making money. We have no problem shelling out over inflated payments to buy a gas guzzling new car that drops a third of its value as soon as you drive it from the showroom, or taking out a mortgage of several thousand dollars to buy our dream home. We are happy to pay $1.75 for a plain tea, several times a day, Read the rest of this entry »

My husband asked me if I’d heard about the new Honda Ad. I said no – and what was so special about it? Well, he showed me the ad and my mouth dropped open. Wow! I could watch this forever. Well, nearly forever! Here’s some cool background about the ad as well, courtesy of one of Huzza’s mates… Apparently this ad is becoming the most down-loaded ad in Internet history and after watching it I can see why. It’s quite fascinating. No wonder it took 606 takes! I just had to post about it. Read on!

Read the info first, and then watch the clip.

“There are no computer graphics or digital tricks in the film. Everything you see really happened in real time exactly as you see it.

Amazing Advert

The film took 606 takes. On the first 605 takes, something, usually very minor, didn’t work. They would then have to set the whole thing up again. The crew spent weeks shooting night and day. By the time it was over, they were ready to change professions.

The film cost six million dollars and took three months to complete including full engineering of the sequence. In addition, it’s two minutes long so every time Honda airs the film on British television, they’ re shelling out enough dough to keep any one of us in clover for a lifetime. Honda executives figure the ad will soon pay for itself simply in “free viewings” (Honda isn’t paying a dime to have you watch this commercial!). When the ad was pitched to senior executives, they signed off on it immediately without any hesitation - including the costs.

There are six and only six hand-made Honda Accords in the world. To the horror of Honda engineers, the filmmakers disassembled two of them to make the film. Everything you see in the film (aside from the walls, floor, ramp, and complete Honda Accord) is parts from those two cars.The voiceover is Garrison Keillor. When the ad was shown to Honda executives, they commented on how amazing computer graphics have gotten. They fell off their chairs when they found out it was for real.

Oh, and about those funky windshield wipers. On the new Accords, the windshield wipers have water sensors and are designed to start doing their thing automatically as soon as they become wet”.

Brilliant!

You are childfree, and perfectly happy with your choice not to procreate, even though others seem to have a problem with it. But here’s a situation that one of my readers experienced and raised as one for discussion. I’ve experienced similar and would guess that many childfree people come up against it too.

You are in conversation with a friend during which you mention that you and your partner are in no way interested in having kids. Sometimes, if you’re feeling expansive, you may elaborate on the reasons why – which don’t really matter in the long run, you feel, because “We don’t want kids. End of story. Get over it”.

To your consternation, your friend (or friends) seem not only disbelieving, but almost distraught. Because they just cannot believe you really don’t want kids. Why? WHY? they ask, becoming more and more persistent and upset. You are in a stable relationship, you’re educated, positive contributors to society, well adjusted and doing well job-wise.Well-off too. In other words, to them, you’re perfect parent material. Read the rest of this entry »

Today is my birthday. January 22. Slap bang in the middle of long January, when people are still getting over their Christmas shopping reality check. Or not. It’s another year but I love birthdays! Birthdays are YOUR special day.

Living in Toronto with my immediate family (Mum, Dad, brothers and sisters) in the UK, it was so nice to have phone calls from England and Europe from my family and friends. As well as my family in Canada. And birthday cards – which they go to extra effort to post to make sure they arrive on time.

But I had a lovely surprise today – around 2.45 at work, the receptionist popped her head round and said to me “ You have something out at reception…”

“Really?” I said, all excited. “Yes. And you can’t miss them”.

So I hurry out – to find a sight that always turns me to mush… a dozen beautiful red roses. Well, she was right - there was no missing them. Sent by my lovely husband, who hadn’t breathed a word even though we’d talked twice on the phone today. They’re sitting on my desk where I can see them and smile at them – and share them with my colleagues (seems to make the men feel guilty, heh heh!).

My day had been hectic, packed full of meetings, but my roses really made my day. Flowers always mean a lot to me because when we were dating – just over seven years ago now – Huzza and I both lived in different countries (Toronto, Canada and London,England) and couldn’t be together as often as we wanted and he always sent me flowers. We made do with the Internet and long telephone calls and transatlantic trips, but whenever I got flowers, they always lifted my spirits.

Anyway we’re back from a leisurely dinner and I’m looking at my pressies, squealing in delight and smiling at lovely day… and wondering – why can’t we have birthday week?!

I vote for a birthday week, but my Sweetie doesn’t think too much of the idea. One day a year is plenty for him!

Who gives a shit about this whole sorry episode? Apparently many. Roughly 9 million people to be exact.

After trying studiously to avoid the whole Celebrity Big Brother storm, aka the Goody/Shetty race row, because far more informed folk have been avidly writing and blogging about it, I give up. After all every time I go to check my news sites, there it is. Again. Right in my face and gathering momentum as Jade Goody gets voted off. Better believe it, this is National News. After all didn’t the PM have a view? And even the Mayor of London chimed in – worried that the image of Britain across India garnered from Big Brother might damage jobs. Oh, please! Read the rest of this entry »

The Childfree Network, started by Leslie LaFayette, and which I mentioned in an earlier article is based on the following beliefs. I couldn’t agree more, and thought they are worth sharing. Worth shouting from the rooftops, in fact!

• That childfree adults or adults who are childless by chance or choice have a right to be recognized, respected and appreciated for their unique contributions and not to be judged on whether or not they have children.
• That too many people are not giving enough careful thought to the decision to have children today.
• That it is time to begin to honestly educate young people to the realities of parenting.
• That biology is not destiny, that one’s self esteem and sexual identity should have nothing to do with one’s fertility or virility.
• That we are whole and complete just the way we we are.
• Once a decision has been made not to have children it should be respected by everyone.
• A childfree life can be a full, productive, happy life and should be carefully considered by those who are not absolutely sure they want to be parents.
• It is time our society and our governments considers a re-definition of the word “family” to include, rather than exclude, the growing segments of society that do not reflect the traditional families of the fifties.

(Source: The Parenthood Decision, by Beverly Engel).