Comments on: Want A Baby? No Sperm? Try The Internet http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/ The Interests of a Childfree Brit Living in Toronto Fri, 09 Jan 2009 21:46:35 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.5 By: Britgirl http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2785 Britgirl Sun, 13 May 2007 03:59:36 +0000 http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2785 Amie - Although this couple said they tried adoption and failed, I think one reason people refuse to accept the fact that they may not have children ( and that adoption might be an option to consider if they want a child) is that what they want isn't so much a child, but child that is a replica of themselves. They feel they must have their own, DNA, their own blood, etc, etc. It has to be "their child." That one need seems to be enough to drive women to ridiculous extremes (internet sperm shopping included), to the point of not even fully check the genetic material of largely unknown sperm donor. There's and absurdity about that. Amie - Although this couple said they tried adoption and failed, I think one reason people refuse to accept the fact that they may not have children ( and that adoption might be an option to consider if they want a child) is that what they want isn’t so much a child, but child that is a replica of themselves. They feel they must have their own, DNA, their own blood, etc, etc. It has to be “their child.” That one need seems to be enough to drive women to ridiculous extremes (internet sperm shopping included), to the point of not even fully check the genetic material of largely unknown sperm donor. There’s and absurdity about that.

]]> By: Amie http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2731 Amie Sat, 12 May 2007 13:39:38 +0000 http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2731 This is just absurd. I was told 6 1/2 years ago that I would never have children. I was heartbroken, I cried for days, and I accepted it. We decided to foster/adopt. Oddly enough, once we moved from "this is our only option" to "this is a good option" to "hey, I think I like this option", we got pregnant. Fortunately for us, my doctor was very very wrong. Point is, I agree with the poster who mentioned all the wonderful children who need loving homes. I've never (though I'm sure they exist) met an adoptive parent who felt like their adopted child wasn't entirely theirs simply because they didn't share genetic material. Imo, being childless when you desperately want a child is far less of a worry than being parentless when you desperately want a parent. We were blessed with three wonderful boys, but we will still foster/adopt when our youngest is a tad older. After all, we really do like that option. This is just absurd.

I was told 6 1/2 years ago that I would never have children. I was heartbroken, I cried for days, and I accepted it. We decided to foster/adopt. Oddly enough, once we moved from “this is our only option” to “this is a good option” to “hey, I think I like this option”, we got pregnant. Fortunately for us, my doctor was very very wrong.

Point is, I agree with the poster who mentioned all the wonderful children who need loving homes. I’ve never (though I’m sure they exist) met an adoptive parent who felt like their adopted child wasn’t entirely theirs simply because they didn’t share genetic material.

Imo, being childless when you desperately want a child is far less of a worry than being parentless when you desperately want a parent.

We were blessed with three wonderful boys, but we will still foster/adopt when our youngest is a tad older. After all, we really do like that option.

]]> By: Britgirl http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2478 Britgirl Sun, 06 May 2007 23:10:08 +0000 http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2478 RMS - Yes, unless that law is reversed more and more people are going to look for alternative means. And I see more people cashing in on the "sperm gold rush". It seems that in the rush to assert the rights of the donor-conceived children they are alienating the very people who made them possible and overriding their rights to anonymity. Seems ridiculous to me. Maybe they thought that the sperm supply wouldn't be affected. Now they see it is. Not holding my breath for a reversal in the law however. I suspect they will soon have to regulate the internet sperm supplies... merc - That's one way of looking at it. I think it cost them under £30. At least to sign up and get everything done it seemed pretty cheap. In fact, I can see some er... enterprising chaps seeing a real business opportunity there. All that's needed is a web site ;-) Strawberry - I'm amazed that anyone would gamble with that kind of risk when there could be any number of genetic diseases possible. But apparently the need for a baby seems to override caution - at least according to the story. Maybe just crossing their fingers and hoping for the best... RMS - Yes, unless that law is reversed more and more people are going to look for alternative means. And I see more people cashing in on the “sperm gold rush”. It seems that in the rush to assert the rights of the donor-conceived children they are alienating the very people who made them possible and overriding their rights to anonymity. Seems ridiculous to me. Maybe they thought that the sperm supply wouldn’t be affected. Now they see it is. Not holding my breath for a reversal in the law however. I suspect they will soon have to regulate the internet sperm supplies…

merc - That’s one way of looking at it. I think it cost them under £30. At least to sign up and get everything done it seemed pretty cheap. In fact, I can see some er… enterprising chaps seeing a real business opportunity there. All that’s needed is a web site ;-)

Strawberry - I’m amazed that anyone would gamble with that kind of risk when there could be any number of genetic diseases possible. But apparently the need for a baby seems to override caution - at least according to the story. Maybe just crossing their fingers and hoping for the best…

]]> By: strawberry muffin http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2417 strawberry muffin Sat, 05 May 2007 03:15:36 +0000 http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2417 " i wonder how much this best interest cost them." Hopefully no one's life. Gambling with unknown sperm in this day and age? I'm sorry, but no DNA replicant is worth that. ” i wonder how much this best interest cost them.”

Hopefully no one’s life. Gambling with unknown sperm in this day and age? I’m sorry, but no DNA replicant is worth that.

]]> By: mercurior http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2392 mercurior Fri, 04 May 2007 19:19:35 +0000 http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2392 well reading this, i just have to say, well at least all those porn sites, will be useful in other things now, hell getting paid for looking at those sites.. ;-) seriously ", she says, she had to trust their donor “had their best interests at heart.” , i wonder how much this best interest cost them. well reading this, i just have to say, well at least all those porn sites, will be useful in other things now, hell getting paid for looking at those sites.. ;-)

seriously “, she says, she had to trust their donor “had their best interests at heart.” , i wonder how much this best interest cost them.

]]> By: RMS http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2387 RMS Fri, 04 May 2007 15:06:23 +0000 http://thebritgirl.com/2007/05/04/want-a-baby-no-sperm-try-the-internet/#comment-2387 Wild! But with this new law, not entirely unexpected. I think it's absurd to demand that an anonymous donor suddenly has to fear "being traced or hit upon for financial or other support by their donor-conceived children." No wonder there's a shortage! So of course people will turn to drastic and equally absurd measures, like using someone off the Internet with absolutely no guarantee of them being vetted in any way. How scary to just take someone's word about their HIV status or genetic background. Granted, I find such desperation for having your "own" child questionable when there are so many who need loving parents, but it is reality for some people. I would rather they were able to use reputable sperm banks that have a system for checking their donors. If that means anonymous donors are protected, I think that's their right, and to me this law is the big problem. How stupid to try to force a sperm donor to financially support a child! I hope this kind of story causes people to rethink this law and reverse it. Wild! But with this new law, not entirely unexpected. I think it’s absurd to demand that an anonymous donor suddenly has to fear “being traced or hit upon for financial or other support by their donor-conceived children.” No wonder there’s a shortage! So of course people will turn to drastic and equally absurd measures, like using someone off the Internet with absolutely no guarantee of them being vetted in any way. How scary to just take someone’s word about their HIV status or genetic background.

Granted, I find such desperation for having your “own” child questionable when there are so many who need loving parents, but it is reality for some people. I would rather they were able to use reputable sperm banks that have a system for checking their donors. If that means anonymous donors are protected, I think that’s their right, and to me this law is the big problem. How stupid to try to force a sperm donor to financially support a child!

I hope this kind of story causes people to rethink this law and reverse it.

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