Comments on: Sperm Donors Valued Less Than Egg Donors

By: mercurior

mercurior — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 21:13:30 +0000

thats the way the story seemed to be slanted. at least to us.
it was nothing personal towards you. its the way the writers put it.

I think you did a thing for your friends that not many would consider, even though it ended badly. i am sure those people you donated the eggs to would be great parents.

So if anyone is to blame for angling it into the sympathy side its the reporters, we agree people should know everything, but a lot are told.

By: Imnosaint

Imnosaint — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 19:45:10 +0000

I’m the donor in the daily mail story and having read your comment I would like to stress that I’m no saint…and I’m not looking for sympathy…I was warned of side effects but infertility was not one of them at the time. I appreciate that you have an opinion on the subject but really my aim was to hopefully warn other women that their own fertility is at risk when donating eggs. I have got a child and I’m very lucky but I had my child when I was 18 and would have liked to have the choice to have more children in the future. But having the child I have, I appreciate how lucky I am. What’s not ok is the 6 operations I have had since the IVF treatment and the pain resulting from the treatment and my 6 monthly scans and meetings with my consultant, quite frankly it’s not life threatening but it’s definately life affecting. I’m quite sure no other woman donating their eggs would want this and I strongly urge women considering donating their eggs to consider all the risks carefully. I’m no saint believe me I was just trying to give my friends the chance to have a family. As for the sperm donor..it wasn’t mentioned as it wasn’t relevant.

By: mercurior

mercurior — Mon, 11 Jun 2007 08:42:58 +0000

lemur, why must people be degraded to have equality, women treated like crap because men are treated like crap, shouldnt it be treat men and woman the same is it easier to put women down than boost men.

thats one of the biggest problems, the difference of men and women, its all well and good talking about equality, but in reality women are treated better than men. mothers are treated better than childfree women.

look at the divorce rates, the pro woman laws, the vawa, the battered womens shelters, am i saying we shouldnt have them.. no. what i am saying is treat men the same, battered mens shelters, best interested of the child in divorces not automatically making the woman the sole parent and expect the man to pay.

why must people become less to be equal, why not boost other to become equal. it may be harder but much more rewarding

By: Britgirl

Britgirl — Mon, 11 Jun 2007 03:44:24 +0000

Lemur - no-one is advocating women being treated like crap. They should be treated well. And yes, egg donation is much more invasive than sperm donation. It still does not account for the double standard uncovered by the researcher. Both men and women should be treated with equal respect in terms of donation.

Leslie - I wouldn’t be surprised if even the sperm donors themselves were unaware of the value of their sperm. The lack of information is quite astonishing.

By: Lemur

Lemur — Sun, 10 Jun 2007 22:59:40 +0000

Women are treated well because if they were treated like crap for undergoing fertility treatments and invasive procedures to help other people they would leave. Egg donation isn’t nearly as easy as sperm donation.

By: Mel

Mel — Tue, 29 May 2007 19:40:20 +0000

Britgirl: I read the article mentioned by Mercurior about a week ago and had pretty much the same thoughts as you did.

By: mercurior

mercurior — Tue, 29 May 2007 19:13:35 +0000

exactly britgirl, thats the similarity i meant, but its not only just the sperm, its also the egg quality, its known to degrade over time, so its a combination of the both..

By: Leslie

Leslie — Tue, 29 May 2007 06:47:42 +0000

It is interesting that sperm and their importance are so misunderstood. It is the age and quality of the sperm donor and his genetic background that carries the difference for the child’s health. If the sperm donor has no serious genetic illnesses in his background and he is between 24-and 31 his sperm are worth much more than gold to any child produced. If the donor is 35 or over beware. People have no idea that sperm are responsible for introducing all kinds of disorders and genetic disease when the father is over 34. It gets worse with age so men who are in their mid 20s and very healthy should be treated as if they are donating pure gold.

By: Britgirl

Britgirl — Tue, 29 May 2007 00:09:01 +0000

I would say that the similarity as related to the research on the fertility industry is that the overall tone of the story is “The saintly theme” that runs throughout the daily mail stroy. In donating her eggs twice, she is described as “generous” portrayed as “self-sacrificing” “nurturing” (of course), “long suffering” and the woman, who, in her own words, “couldn’t say no” and “didn’t want to be the person responsible for [the other woman] being childless!! By this time I was looking in earnest for the puke bucket. I gather we are supposed to think ah, poor woman who is never going to be able to conceive.. and feel really sorry for her, but hang on - she is a single mother of one according to the article.

Personally, I don’t buy the self-sacrificing line. She really should have had more sense than to keep donating her eggs, in spite of the risks (she was warned). But suppose it must have been a heady feeling for her to be “giving life” and “helping two little lives into the world” and the story makes her out to be almost a saint. Spare me.

Now, even though she can’t have any more of her own she has at least two women and at least two kids who will be eternally grateful to her for “giving them life.” Of course, going back to my original post on the research, no surprise that I see no mention of the male half of the donation story… At any rate it’s all about the eggs - the egg donor and giving someone a chance to have a baby.

By: mercurior

mercurior — Mon, 28 May 2007 21:18:31 +0000

this is an interesting story, sort of similar to the ones that have been mentioned

A woman who gave her eggs to help two childless friends fears she has been left infertile by her act of kindness.

Donna Stickels, 26, revealed her personal ordeal to warn other women about the potential dangers of egg donation.

Her story began seven years ago when she offered to help a married friend who was desperate to start a family after years of failed fertility treatment.

Donna’s generosity resulted in the delighted woman giving birth to twin boys and she later became their godmother.

A second donation of eggs to another friend failed to result in a pregnancy, but the woman later conceived naturally.

Although both childless women realised their dream of becoming mothers, the fertility treatment appears to have had tragic implications for Donna.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=453507&in_page_id=1770