In fact, our own kids are mortified at how badly behaved other kids are in public.

Maybe it is risky, but if a kid mouths off in front of me, even in public, and even if it’s not my own kid, a loud, deep-voiced, “What is WRONG with you? Didn’t you just get told to sit DOWN?”
will silence them. I think using the phrase, “What is WRONG with YOU”
is very effective, because it really hits home that the CHILD is completely at fault. The look on there face usually says, “….nobody ever told me anything was my fault before….”

Oh, and if anybody’s interested, yes we did spank our kids when they were young. Not often, but then, if you really discipline your kids, you DON’T have to spank them much. In fact, I bet after age 5, we never had to even once. They behave out of respect and fear of authority - two things that are sadly missing these days, even amongst adults.

“OK. So parenting is no cakewalk. We know. That’s why I am childfree. We know that a parent will resignedly say “Well, it’s all right for you, you should try raising kids and see how easy it is to control them.”

Um, no. They are yours, you brought them into the world and we are never allowed to forget it since you keep telling us what a mistake we’ve made by not following your example and reproducing. YOU are responsible for controlling them, for bringing them up to be polite, with manners. Remember?”

Could I POSSIBLY agree MORE?! I don’t THINK so!!! Well said!!

Lemur - oh yes, funny that the ones who won’t dare tell their child the right thing still resent anyone else from doing it either. Like “How dare you talk to my child like that…” They never seem to be able to see it.I think that’s how they (don’t) deal with it. The kid sees it though.

Tanya - Yep, me too. I’d never tolerate that. I can’t imagine the state telling me I am not allowed discipline my child - something that is neccessary for them for God’s sake! Or that I should be my child’s “friend.” What a joke. What happened to being your child’s parent?

Yet, what do we hear? Oh, how can you not want children? You should have children… you must have children..parenting is wonderful, look at us! Well, I did look and it was enough to turn me off parenting - if I had had the slightest interest in the first place

Mel: Baffles me how any parent can allow their kids to talk to them in that way. I almost cringe when I hear it - what that tells me that they know they can do it and what’s more their mother would do exactly as they said. And they were in public - don’t want to imagine what they say in their home. It makes me glad I have the parents I have.

Anne-Marie - it will be very interesting indeed. Doesn’t bode well that’s for sure. I think that reader nailed it as well.. but it begs the question - why do they have children then? As trophies? just because they can?

Lucky you - it must be that look in your eye - a colleague of mine told once that a child in her sister’s school, when asked not to do something, said to her ” You can’t tell me what to do! You’re not the boss of me!” The child was about nine.

I can tell you that personally, if any hypothetical child of mine ever spoke to me in such a manner, or hit me, they’d get it right back. Nothing like a return smack to understand what it is to hurt someone. As a teacher, I am rarely spoken to that way- there must be that look in my eyes that says, Don’t even try it.

I think one of the Daily Mail readers who commented nailed the problem- it’s parents who don’t spend enough time with their kids. When you have minimal time, you don’t want to spend it doing the grunt work, and you’re so tired you don’t want to invest time and energy into meaningful discipline. The combination of tiredness and guilt is deadly, and the result is that spoilt brat.

I’m 24 years old and I still would never dream of talking to my mom that way (because she’d still do the same thing to me ) Sure, my brother and I got spanked, but because we knew our parents never bluffed and never negotiated (if they said you were getting busted, you were and fighting it only made it worse) they didn’t have to do it all that often.

You’re supposed to be your child’s parent not their friend. There is a huge difference. Sure, my mom and I are friends now and have a great relationship, but we’re also both adults. When I was growing up, she was my parent because she wouldn’t hesitate to discipline me. Of course, I didn’t like it and was ticked at her for a little while but her attitude toward that was ‘tough, they’ll get over it’. She didn’t care if she “hurt my feelings” or “made me mad at her.” She was doing what she was supposed to do and what was best for me and my brother (not to mention society). So many “parents” want their children to “like them” that they’re scared to do anything to their kids that might upset them. What we end up with are the kids ruling the roost, not the parents, and they develop the “entitlement” attitude which does not get any better as they get older. Okay, getting off my soapbox now…

If that had been my kid with the cricket bat, I probably would have hit him back. But I’m mean like that and that is why I do not have kids.

And I too have seen kids like this in action. Cussing their parents the hell out, refusing to obey or follow directions, and running completely amok basking in their inherent brattiness.

I can’t imagine how these parents cope through life without jumping off a building or overdosing on Children’s Tylenol.

I really can’t.

True, some parents have been shown on videotape going way out of line with the discipline, going into abuse territory. But these incidents are few and far between. I was raised from the beginning to have a healthy respect for my parents. If I got out of line, all it took was a scolding and/or threat from my dad to whip me back in line. I was rarely spanked, but the times that I was, it was done swiftly and just enough to learn a lesson. And always with my parents saying they didn’t want to do that ever again.

Love sometimes requires good discipline… Tough love!