When you say that our society is pro-natalist, I conjure the image of parents as factory farmed beings, simply giving birth, but then handing off the kids to institutions to be raised according to State ideology. No wonder we’re do messed up.

However, I don’t think it’s personal. You see, everyone here says they have nieces, or friends with kids that they admire, and we could start talking about those children and those parents… but then this blog would not be about childfree, but about parenting and kids.

We talk about the bad parents more because we do think those bad parents should be chilfree as well. And we are frustrated that they, themselves, if given the chance to think a bit, would choose to be childfree.

If you consider yourself a good parent, don’t take it personal, because it means we are not talking about you.

If childfree is such a happy, carefree lifestyle, then why are they so angry? Something is clearly not working for them.

I am pleased you’ll keep reading. I somehow don’t think you were ever “one of the child-free” if you were waiting to have a child at any point. And on that point, if you read enough on this blog and others, you’ll gain an understanding of exactly what being child-free means. I’m not sure what you’re referring to in your comment on ” saying nasty things” so I won’t bother to address it.

As for you seeing why people come here to bash our views… sorry, but there is no excuse for them, particularly not defensiveness. I do not visit childed blogs to bash their views. They often simply cannot tolerate the thought that some people don’t want children, don’t really care what they’ve gone through – since they freely chose to have said children – … and don’t like the kids they seem unable to control and expect everyone to put up with.

One thing is very clear to me. And it is worth an article in itself. It’s that childfree blogs and forums are very important and very much needed and the hate-filled envious flamers are going to have their work cut out.

What a waste of energy. What is it about some women (in particular) that they cannot seem to tolerate any other choice other than the one THEY made?

Kim – hello – I have always thought your articles were very well balanced. Pretty sad that some see fit to send nasty email and be destructive. I’m still puzzled how whether my parents wanted kids or not has anything to do with my own choice to not have them!

Usually, with BellaOnline, people just don’t always realize they are at the Married No Kids site, because it falls under the heading “Relationships.” But there are those who set out to be demeaning and destructive, and those people are asked to leave.

I try to maintain a rather “tame” forum, because I don’t want to be another anti-child, family hating site. Married No Kids is more about finding peace with and support for your desire not to have children. Nothing more, nothing less.

Kim
MNK Editor

i want them to come.. i want to rip them a new one.. but they dont

There are so few places where childfree people can truly vent their frustrations that I can quite understand why their forums fulfill this role. Until blogs, there was no-where at all. It is a pity the apolgetic streak is creeping in, but I feel that people who don’t want it can always go off and form community.

Many of my friends are parents and I know for a fact that they are great parents – and their kids are super kids so one can’t lump everyone in together. Having said that though, our childfree experience if full of certain parents who find it quite ok to question our choice and are not accepting of it and until being childfree isn’t seen as some kind of “freaky abnormality” there is going to be room for many more childfree blogs.

We can’t do anything about what breeders do on their board, except try and set the record straight where we feel we can… so I am only really concerned about what happens on my blog as that’s what I can control.

But Phoeana’s point is a good one. Why hang out on a childfree blog (if you aren’t a friend, supporter or learner) to stir up trouble?

It makes no sense – unless the intent is malicious. But hey, I have to admit there IS an entertainment value

My list of rules don’t help much, seeing as most of them don’t read the rules. In fact, I think most of the trolls I get don’t read my site AT ALL, they just believe some lie or exaggeration their friends tell them, and start cussing me out for something I never even said or did. *shrug*

I still have fun with it, though. Most of the hate mail I get is at least a little amusing. Some of it is downright hysterical! I don’t mind the trolls and hate mail much, though, because it’s free entertainment.

Some bimbo emailed me a couple of weeks ago saying, “I just don’t get the point of your site! What do you people think you’re going to accomplish!” So I emailed her back and said, “You didn’t even read the site, did you?” and gave her links to the pages where I clearly state why I have a site and what the (general) goals are of the (general) childfree community. She emailed back and said, “I did too read those pages! They just weren’t clear enough to understand!” Not clear enough? She must be joking. She’s obviously never read any of it, but is trying not to look like the complete moron she is. Very amusing.