It is that time of year again. Christmas, the Holidays, the end of one year, and the beginning of another. While Christmas can be a joyous time for many it can also be a time of stress for others too. I happen to love Christmas, the hustle and bustle, putting up the tree, lights, decoration, carols… and just the general Christmassy feeling. I’ve always enjoyed the season, even when my life hasn’t been going smoothly. I’ve spent Christmas on my own several times (years ago now), however I happen to be one of those people who has always been quite comfortable with my own company, even before I really thought about being childfree or not. Today I was telling someone that (someone who was talking about the Holidays and Christmas being for kids and getting together with family etc, etc) and they seemed quite shocked that anyone could ever spend Christmas on their own and enjoy it.
Well, I did – and I got a childlike joy out of it too 
. For the childfree this season can be especially trying. Getting together with family can be good… or it can be like treading on eggshells as we childfree dodge questions as to when we’re going to reproduce (and do our duty to country, parent and the world at large) whether well-meaning or not. Or we get the “Oh, but Christmas is for kids!” effectively trying to negate our ability to get any joy out of the season without kids to buy (expensive) presents for. Who’d be a parent, when balancing the budget or going into more debt to buy that iphone for 10 year-old Johnny is top of the list? Do kids like simple toys these days? You know, like Lego, musical boxes… BB Guns?
Probably not. And no-one can negate anything about us unless we give them permission.
Whatever your situation if you’re childfree – and most of you are – you have enough to be able to stand your ground. At least, if you’ve been reading the blog all year. You can brush of enquiries and refuse to be drawn on the kid question. You know it will probably come up, even if it isn’t actually said in words. To be honest, not a lot has changed… childfree people are still looked at as oddities for not wanting children, we still get our choices questioned while the childed never do. But we don’t have to defend ourselves, we can say the “why” is none of another’s business. It is NOT easy, as we know from many conversation on this blog – not by a long, long shot. But then being true to yourself isn’t necessarily the smooth road and that can be hard…and lonely. We do have online communities, like this one, where one important thing happens.
Childfree people learn that they are NOT alone.
Anyway, whether you celebrate the season or not, I want to wish you and your families the Season’s Greetings – a peaceful and safe Holiday Season (Merry Christmas to my UK and European Readers) and a very Happy New Year. Thanks for all your comments, your participation, posts, article ideas and thoughts, the comments that’ve made me laugh and the ones that have made me sad, the conversations… and so much more. I read every one of them. You guys truly ROCK, big time! And being Childfree rocks!
Here’s to great things in 2010!
I may do a post between Christmas and New Year… depending on how I feel (taking a break from a very busy year is top of the list right now). Feel free to comment as usual on any of the posts – most are evergreen – and see you next year.
BG
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
A fresh way to express your love ones a Merry Christmas and a happy new year..
CHeck out http://www.closeupfreshbreath.in/
Children..Cant see why anyone wants them so much more during x-mas.
No bingo can convince me that parenthood is a bless. The truth is still written in the face of every parent.
Look forward to the peace and simply take a break from daily life.
Happy holidays!
-Scrouge..:)
Luckily for us, the kids we spend the most time with (my sister-in-law’s four) are rather well-behaved and fun to be around. Still young enough to like pretty much everything you buy them, and old enough to like money, too. Easy peasy. I usually just shop at thinkgeek.com. youngexplorers.com, evolvems.com, maplelandmark.com, and book stores. That way, I can influence their brains while they think there’s getting presents. Muah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
Also luckily, we’ve been childfree long enough around the same people that they don’t bother us about it anymore. We get to enjoy the season, while silently judging everyone.
I just watched the 1961 “Babes in Toyland” movie today (as a way of reliving my childhood, which CAN be done without kids of one’s own), and was just thinking about how kids today don’t play with the simple toys anymore, like the ones in that movie. Do they even know what a wooden soldier is? Or marbles? I teach Pre-K, and kids are asking for Wiis, Nintendo DS’es and I know a kindergartener who got a digital camera for Xmas! You mean these parents actually buy into the belief that they HAVE to buy expensive gifts at Christmas to show their love for their kids? Even in the bad economy? “I will give my daughter a great Christmas to show I love her, even if I’m pinching pennies.” WTF?
Just recently I’ve been travelling a lot by train. And all the kids on the train seemed to have mobile-phone sized devices with extremely annoying beeping games on them. It must have cost their parents a packet…what’s wrong with the old-fashioned toys (which had the advantage of neither needing batteries or being noisy)? I wonder if the expense was appreciated…
I had a nice, childfree Christmas this year. But then, my family is only really my mam and dad, because we pretty much hate the rest of our family. Also, we’re all atheists, so yay! No religious BS from anyone either! My boyfriend’s cousin got a laptop, a dvd player, an iPhone and an iPod (wtf?). She’s 14, and has been caught drinking a bunch of times in the last two months. Drinking in the park, when she should’ve been in school. If I pulled that shit at her age, I’d be lucky to get a book for Christmas. Her parents aren’t exactly well off either…
My Christmas wasn’t childfree by any means but it’s the first Christmas in two years where I’ve actually been home to visit friends and family so I’m grateful.
Kids don’t grasp the expense of gifts. My two friends here both have kids (either their own or their partner’s). We were talking about how one kid got a big action figure toy, and the girl piped up and said she got netbook (mini laptop) which was a “medium toy”. My friends automatically cried out, “That’s a very big toy! You could get loads of physically large toys for the same cost!” She gave a blank look and ran off to play with something else. I think the only way kids will realize how much things cost and the value of it is if parents really drill it into their heads at all ages, and then will need to expect it will take years to sink in. Raising kids must be so exhausting.
Being around the kids did do something wonderful for me though: made me really value my downtime when they weren’t around. So while my friends are exhausted and can’t wait till work resumes so they can get a break from the stress of the holidays, I can kick back and relax now
Cheers!
This was a wonderful Christmas for me! My husband’s kids didn’t come, and its been awesome. We moved to a different continent and finally a pleasant holiday season, without the horrid BOREDOM of children, their beeping gadgets, screeching voices and a general wet blanket on Christmas fun, drinks and sex. Yay for me! I think children ruin, not enhance Christmas. And everything else.